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So, I got a $100 dollar bill for xmas from my kind Aunt and Uncle. While I am now rich beyond my wildest dreams the bill is the plague! I am new to toting around a 100 dollar bill (I prefer Hamilton and Jackson) and let me tell you its impossible to spend, even in Chicago. I tried to use it to buy a sandwich and the lady looked at me like I was trying to hand her a bunch of pesos or some British pounds. She kindly asked if I had anything smaller which I did, but didn't want to give up, but I am not one for conflict so I quickly passed her a 10.

The next place I tried to pawn off the Franklin was an office supply store in attempts to obtain a permanent marker. Again, I was turned down and asked if I had anything "smaller." Foiled again! So now my anxiety surrounding my new found fortune is acting up. I am paranoid to whip out the hundo because the fear of being denied for a smaller bill, and I am also paranoid because I am rolling around the city with a fortune in my back pocket! I have even withdrawn money since getting my xmas gift because I have had such a tough time spending it. Maybe I need to start buying more stuff at once. Like, instead of buying two records I buy eight or instead of having a beer with my dinner I order a 50 dollar glass of cognac. Like Biggie Smalls (aka Chistopher Wallace) said best, mo' money mo' problems.

Ohh and I don't want to come off as thankless for my Aunt and Uncle's gift, because I am very thankful, they are great folks. So-if you have money you want to send, just email me at analoggiant@gmail.com and I can figure out a way to spend it.

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